<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe train had left Kiev in the night.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He never really stopped. He only slowed down to let those who had been called away up or down.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In the central wagon, the pigs occupied the most comfortable seats, reinforced \u00abfor reasons of safety and decision-making comfort\u00bb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Files were stacked in front of them, and on the table, a suspicious object was quickly removed from view by a camera.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Pig-like gazes suddenly fell upon them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe a truffle.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nOne of them grumbled softly as he adjusted his glasses.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014 Agreement validated!<\/em><\/strong>He immediately translated for an assistant.<\/p>\n\n\n\nNo one asked what agreement had just been ratified.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Through the windows, agricultural, residential, or transit areas were visible. Everything seemed classified into compartments even before being observed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014 The satisfaction indicators are bad, declared a pig.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 We may have to send troops to the ground.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nAn embarrassed silence ensued.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014 Not so simple. Patriotism reserves are currently too weak.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 We had, however, planned that providing helmets and vests would be sufficient.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 And then the Ukrainian recruitment agencies are not yet considered exhausted.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 And in the name of equality, There are still the women.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 Okay! In the meantime, we still need to accompany our<\/strong> Public opinion.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe three pigs were neither reckless nor courageous.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nFor a long time, they had learned never to upset some pigs who were bigger than them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The resounding Outlander Pig from the Atlantic.
The wicked Phacoch\u00e8re of the Middle East.
Their very names were enough to lower the tone of the conversations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The silence that followed seemed to say it all.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nNo one mentioned the Little Isle Wild Boar.
Officially, the case was closed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Secretly, everyone avoided asking why so many influential Pourceaux had frequented the place. His shepherding selection<\/strong>.
The files had disappeared.
The witnesses too.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nWe moved on to the next item on the agenda.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The train then entered an administrative tunnel, and for a few minutes everything simply became a series of decisions being processed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In Brussels<\/strong>, A new topic mobilized the main pig farms on the continent.
Despite the considerable efforts made in recent years, a fraction of the herd continued to exhibit irrational behaviors.<\/p>\n\n\n\nThe most recent analyses were considered to be concerning.
A new large-scale health campaign was envisaged.
The experts were stunned: there<\/strong> Grande Porcherie Sanitaire, the Observatory of Bovine Behaviour and the<\/strong> College of Certified Truths.<\/p>\n\n\n\nUnanimous conclusion: deficit of trust among the governed.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nIn the face of conspiratorial objections from all quarters, new bodies were created to enlighten recalcitrant minds:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014 Observatory of Farm Theory; ;
\u2014 Institute for the Validation of Reality; ;
\u2014 Authority for Vigilance of Conspiratorial Activities.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Their mission was simple: to distinguish the real from the fake, the rational from the irrational, and to remind the masses of what was good for them., in accordance with human and civil rights.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nA report indicated an increase in the number of demonstrations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014 Should we be worried?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 Certainly not.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 Why?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 The demonstrations constitute a a recognized indicator of freedom of expression.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 And the outbursts?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 They constitute an indicator Recognized for operational training.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe phenomenon was reclassified as a \u00absuccess of democratic governance\u00bb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Since the political situation was now satisfactory, we moved on to the economic situation.<\/strong>
The pigs examined a report that had already been read by everyone and understood by no one.<\/p>\n\n\n\nUnemployment is rising.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Cost of living on the rise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Debt rising.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Institutional satisfaction stable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Another case was mentioned.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 The price of fuel is rising.
\u2014 False problem!<\/strong><\/em> The pig replied, originally the idea of taking less showers came up at the beginning of the conflict.
\u2014 Why?
\u2014 You just don\u2019t have to fill up the tank. You can even pay less.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nWe moved on to the next point.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nOn a photograph, a man was sitting at a desk, hands on the face.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 Our services have not yet identified him.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 Hypothetical assumptions?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 Russian minister?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 No. The photo comes from a French news channel during a briefing.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 Media expertise: Four-star general in strategic interpretation.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe collapse of the Russian economy and the military<\/strong> It had been imminent for several years; the strategy was therefore continued.<\/p>\n\n\n\nA supplementary note, however, recalled that once the Ukrainian affair was over, Russia could take its revenge on Europe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014But she\u2019s losing, someone objects.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 Exactly<\/em><\/strong>,<\/em> one of them replied.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 We must therefore prepare ourselves for Russia to go to war as soon as it has finished losing it.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe dossier was classified as a \u00abthreat with variable capabilities\u00bb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We then moved on to a more urgent topic.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nA pressing request came from a pig with a rare longevity:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 Is the former decision-making seat damaged?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 No.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 So why replace it?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 For reasons of Republican continuity.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nAfter consultation, the replacement was validated under institutional resilience.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Further on, an alert indicated an increase in Suicides among farmers.<\/strong>
It was automatically classified in the \u00abknown side effects\u00bb category.<\/p>\n\n\n\nA piglet sighed.
\u2014 We cannot govern from local emotions.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe phrase was recorded as a principle of stability.
The documents were signed without a signature.
By habit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Bruno worked in the service \u00abCitizen interface\u00bb<\/strong>, a designation whose ambiguity was matched only by that of its competence.
He considered himself a translator.
His job was to turn the decisions of the pigs into phrases acceptable to humans.<\/p>\n\n\n\nBruno appreciated the precision of the formulations. They gave him the impression that the world was finally becoming properly readable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u00ab Reduction of staff and increase in workload \u00bb<\/strong> <\/strong>became:<\/strong>
\u2014 adaptation of human resources to the new performance requirements.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u00abProgressive abandonment of certain areas\u00bb became:
\u2014 stabilization of territorial imbalances.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nSometimes he chose the smoothest version rather than the most accurate one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He would soften certain formulations, not out of prudence, but out of comfort.
He had finally confused the correctness of a sentence with its effectiveness.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nOver time, Bruno understood that these pigs<\/strong> They did not use their jargon to hide the reality.
They simply no longer knew how to communicate in any other way.<\/p>\n\n\n\nThe proof appeared to him one morning, during a meeting devoted to a particularly thick dossier. on the reform of pensions.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 The citizens still refuse to accept the measure.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 For how long?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 Since its announcement.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nHe went through several pages before concluding that no category could be considered in which citizens could simply disagree.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014 We must therefore continue our efforts in terms of pedagogy.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nSome decisions still existed even when one stopped reading them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He mentally noted that there was really no difference between understanding a situation and properly rephrasing it.
The file was classified in the category \u00abconsent during the acquisition\u00bb.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe problem may not have been that citizens misunderstood the decisions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The problem was that the decisions no longer lived in the same world as them.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nBruno sometimes had the impression that the train was going too fast for us to be able to look out the windows anymore. Fortunately, the holidays arrived.
Bruno left for Corsica driving his limousine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
At the end of a path, a herd of sheep blocked the road. The shepherd asked him to wait.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Bruno observed the scene for a few moments, unable to place it in a familiar category.
Then, wanting to impress his interlocutor, Bruno proposed a bet:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014 If I find the exact number of your sheep, I will take one of them with me.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe shepherd, amused, accepted.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
After several calculations, estimates, and statistical adjustments, Bruno announced:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014 Two hundred forty-six.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe shepherd, astonished, confirmed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Bruno immediately descended, grabbed a beast and tried to put it in his trunk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The shepherd, laughing, threw at him:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 If I guess your profession, will you hand over my beast to me?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 With pleasure.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\u2014 One of those President's advisors!<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nBruno remained frozen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014 How did you guess it?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe shepherd laughed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2014 Oh poor...<\/em><\/strong> Easy! You came to explain to me how to keep my herd\u2026 and you\u2019re leaving with the dog!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\nAuthor\u2019s note<\/strong>Some passages have been reclassified into the category of \u00abverified facts\u00bb.<\/strong> Contemporary satire faces fierce competition.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nA few days before this publication, the French firefighters \u2014 once designated as firefighters, the soldiers of the fire whose motto is \u00abSave or perish\u00bb \u2014 began a several-week strike to demand resources and personnel.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nThe problem was not, however, caused by the exceptional fires of this summer: their representatives are denouncing it. a situation that has lasted for twenty years.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nIt can be assumed that, in the wagon, someone will propose to classify the request for additional resources as a category \u00abMastery of the rescue\u00bb.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nSoon on your screens, Jupiter, eyes to eyes:<\/strong>
\u2014 Five more years, Mr. Firefighter, \u00abwe are still at war\u00bb <\/em><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Allegorical chronicle of an Europe in autopilot Satire on an out-of-control power Everything is under control. At least, officially. This is the Europe\u2026<\/p>","protected":false},"author":31738,"featured_media":4634,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[611,4,617],"tags":[86,395,366],"class_list":["post-4631","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-europe","category-mis-en-avant","category-politique-france","tag-russie","tag-ukraine","tag-union-europeenne"],"yoast_head":"\n
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Ses \u00e9crits portent sur les crises morales, politiques et civilisationnelles du monde contemporain. 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